Sunday, August 14, 2016

the waitress, version one

version 1 of over 20,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000

illustrated by konrad kraus

bill was a bad guy.

janet was a slut.

bill and janet had 18 children.

they lived with bill’s mom.

bill had a big nose.

janet had the weight of the world on her shoulders.

lucy was bill and janet’s oldest child.

dave was a serial killer.

amanda was the spirit of love in a hate-filled world.

dave thought amanda was a terrorist.

moe was amanda’s long lost child

moe was an easygoing sort.

mickey was moe’s best friend.

bill and dave were on the same bowling team.

dave thought janet had fucked bill up big time.

dave and amanda agreed to compare notes.

tony was a retired delicatessen owner.

carla was the mayor’s wife.

dave ordered a soft roll and a glass of water.

amanda ordered a whole chocolate cake.

the waitress’s name was millie.

she thought amanda was pushy.

tony thought millie should pick up the pace.

carla was bored.

suddenly it started to rain.

millie took a deep breath.

meanwhile janet was packing her suitcase.

and lucy was planning a vacation.

aaron was just a guy.

unknown to aaron, tony was ready to turn state’s evidence.

unknown to amanda, her mother was a trained deadly assassin.

dave was wearing underwear with little cupids on it.

outside on the sidewalk a few raindrops began to fall.

amanda was wearing a pained expression.

millie suddenly remembered life was sad.

carla was thinking about the creepy guy in the garage last night.

tony was thinking about retiring and moving to arizona.

moe was ready to turn his life around.

when his order arrived, dave smiled at millie.

when her order arrived, amanda realized she wasn’t getting any younger.

suddenly tony felt dave looking at him.

returning to the kitchen, millie ate a bread stick.

roy, the cook, was a yankee fan.

nancy, the other waitress, was her own woman.

behind the restaurant, time went by.

walter entered the restaurant, carrying a battered brown briefcase.

walter was desperate.

millie did not recognize walter.

walter ordered two hot dogs, well done, and cole slaw.

walter said it was a nice day.

dave turned around and nodded to walter.

amanda thought, what goes around, comes around.

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